Everybody knows I like to see guys put things up their butts. Even my mother calls when she finds a hot dildo scene I just gotta check out. So of course I thought it was a treat when Titan's Toolbox and Chi Chi LaRue's Rascal: A Toy Story came out. Each was made to show off their company's line of asshole amusements – infomercials, as it were, in the form of fuck fests. Next week: A Toy Story. Right now, the more creative, in-depth and mind-blowing Toolbox .

Brian Mills was the excellent director of Toolbox . He's brought to Titan's epic a cast of stars, fabuloso music, excellent videography and lighting that really lets you see the salacious incidents, and a two-and-a-half-hour sprawl that lays out four generously long scenes in a way that doesn't stint on toy play, but also has enough un-kinked but fierce fucking and sucking to satisfy viewers not particularly into the primary attraction. The exact count, if you wanna know, is 43 minutes with toy, 107 without.

Jay Roberts and Dean Flynn, in his hot-n-happy mode, open the show with a hearty fuck-n-suck. With only five minutes of dildo play, the scene's sort of a warm-up before the more prolonged tool play to come. But they're a good five minutes, and not without a real good thrill. Dean's been alternately inserting his cock and a dildo into Jay when he shoves a dildo up his own butt as he's fucking Jay. If you don't know what kind of hyper-sensation this gives a top, you should try it. I pre

Hungry-assed Will Parker. Photo: Titan Men

fer a butt-plug when I'm screwing some dude, because they're easier to handle, hands-free. You're not twisted around to the rear while you're simultaneously trying to thrust forward from the hip. But Dean's really nimble, and the view from below drove me batty.

Fresh-faced and hungry-assed Will Parker has a long solo to start Scene Two. His pecs are more pumped up than I remember, and the meaty and full swell of his cockhead better displayed. Watch from many angles as his ass grips and then pops loose a solid and fat tool. Watch it, as he does, from many more angles in a mirror. Then he blows up the Inflatable Wonder (a beach ball with dildo attached) and rides and rolls on it deep and satisfying. His buddy Charly Diaz, a hairy-chested and muscularly built dude, joins in, and Will is soon much to be envied, suckin' Charly, jerkin' himself, bouncing his buns on the blow-up ball. It all leads to a particularly nice orgasm. And then Charly fucks the dickens out of him in a way that makes Will spurt far and high yet again.

That blond and vastly broad-shouldered wonder JR Matthews is giving us an eyeful as he engages in mutual hard-on exhibition with nicely cocked Ryan Russell. On the bench next to Ryan, an impressive and slightly scary array of ass toys awaits. JR goes in for some rimming, and when he pulls back to finger Ryan's hole, we see just how much a sphincter can spread in anticipation. Wasn't it Stephen Sondheim who pointed out that a little anticipation is good for the hole?

JR is beautiful. Just watch his muscles ripple across his broad back and shoulders as he dildos Ryan. Open your eyes at Ryan's dildo ass-ability. I love the way his cock throbs as the first dildo slides in. Open your eyes wider when JR inserts an inflatable toy in Ryan's ass, and the bottom pumps the hand-bulb vigorously. Of course, you can't tell how big the thing's become inside him – until JR starts squirreling it in and out of Ryan's ass. The thing's ponderous! It goes in a carrot stick, and comes out a watermelon.

Your eyes will bug out even further when JR lies down, flips his legs over his head and sucks up nearly half of his own dick as Ryan plunges a dildo down JR's upturned ass. But then! Then they spear themselves on a double-ender, which makes JR blast cum over his head. It coats his forehead and drips down into his eyes. Praise the saints, this whole episode is unparalleled.

Quick wrap-up here, I'm outa room. So you'll have to discover the scene with Fabio Stallone and super-donged David Anthony yourself. Anthony's the guy who's sorta Al Parker reborn – but even bigger. The disc's bonus features include an interview in which Anthony discusses his cock, and shows how it works. Finally, you should see Toolbox in Blu-ray. It's gorgeous. www.TitanMen.com